EPHESIANS 4:1-3 – “I therefore, a prisoner for the Lord, urge you to walk in a manner worthy of the calling to which you have been called, with all humility and gentleness, with patience, bearing with one another in love, eager to maintain the unity of the Spirit in the bond of peace.”
THEME OF THE DAY: THE RECIPE FOR HEALTHY RELATIONSHIPS. I am not much of a cook. Actually, I am not a cook at all, but I am blessed with a great wife who is also a great cook. Occasionally I will observe her in the kitchen poring over recipes as she concocts something. I don’t understand the language of recipes – a pinch of salt, ¼ cup of this, a teaspoon of this, a half cup of whatever. The process doesn’t excite but the product does. I do understand the necessity of recipes in the kitchen. They are important. Though I might not be a literal cook understanding recipes, I think there is a pretty good “spiritual recipe” in today’s scripture which will ensure the relationships we have in life are healthy and thriving.
Before I share the “ingredients” for healthy relationships, it would be good to just mention their opposites which are always guaranteed to produce unhealthy relationships. And if we are currently experiencing unhealthy, riddled with tension relationships, these three “heart uglies” will always be present and thriving- pride, harshness of heart, and impatience. Think about times when we are in a painful relationship. Think hard and deep. We will see the presence of all those “heart uglies” and they each are the offspring of selfishness. But let’s look at the positive; the three wonderful virtues the Apostle Paul mentions in today’s scripture ensuring we maintain peaceful and unified relationships no matter the setting; home, work or church.
The first ingredient in the spiritual recipe for healthy relationships is a “heaping” of humility. The Apostle Paul writes “all humility” meaning not just a “pinch”, but to be filled with Christ-like humility. This is so important and without it, forget health in any relationship. Humility allows us to put the interests and welfare of others far ahead of our own. In fact, if the Spirit of God is producing this fruit in us, we will forget ourselves. We will be constantly putting the good of others to the forefront in our relationships. And when humility reigns so does love.
The next ingredient in the spiritual recipe for healthy relationships is a “full portion” of gentleness. The natural outcome of a humble heart is a gentleness in dealing with others. And what does that look like? Think on Jesus. He constantly dealt with people with a gentle touch and that is most captured in what might be known as “The Golden Rule” – treat others as we would like to be treated. Imagine if every relationship in our lives was marked by us treating the other party exactly the way we want to be treated. When we place expectations on others of how we want to be treated, reverse this and begin to handle people the way Jesus handles us – gently and with the kindest of intentions for their building up – how beautiful would our relationships be if humility leading to gentleness characterized them all!
Finally, the remaining ingredient in the spiritual recipe for healthy relationships is the “icing on top” of patience. Why patience to cover humility and gentleness? Because we are sinners. Yes, sinners saved by grace, but sinning saints still. And the only way to ensure harmony and health in our relationships is to be quick to forgive, be quick to bear with one another in our many failings of one another, and be slow to react with unkind words and cruel attitudes. Basically to display a heart of enduring patience by constantly remembering the patience the Lord has with us.
Yes, a recipe for healthy spiritual relationships does exist. And we don’t have to be “expert cooks” to put it into action. All we need is a willing, teachable, and submissive heart to the Spirit of God. He will put humility, gentleness, and patience in the “bowls” of our lives and beautify all our relationships.
PRAYER: Lord, make my heart like Your heart to be manifested in all my relationships.
REFLECTION: Humility, gentleness, and patience will beautify every relationship in our lives.